Although the year just began and we’re only in the second month, I’ve been faced with the most difficult challenges to date. From the toughest mental health battles to realizing my insecurities and toxic traits, this year is showing me to put my peace first.
I forgive myself for accepting what I don’t deserve. I move forward in claiming and proclaiming my worth and value.
If I were to tell you that the lists of things you’ve done, the relationships you have, or the job titles you’ve held don’t make you who you are, would you believe me? If I were to tell you that you are whole just because, would you think I’m wrong?No matter what we do or who we think we have to become we are fundamentally valuable and worth living every single day. It doesn’t matter how much we get done, or how much we’ve been through, every day we wake up we hold the power of our value and worth and that never changes.”I am” despite of anything that follows that statement.
It’s been a really rough 2020 already. It’s tried to knock you down, step on you, and declare your defeat. What 2020 doesn’t know is you already declared that no matter what, you will figure out how to bounce back EVERY SINGLE TIME. No matter how complicated or complex the struggle, nothing will overcome your resilience.
I know you’re hurting but I also know you learned so much through the pain you endured.
You learned that:
It’s okay to be sensitive.
It’s okay to cry and express emotions.
Learn early how to love and accept yourself.
You are different and that fact will catalyst your passion.
People will look out for themselves.
Put yourself first because no one else will.
You are not like everyone, your self-care looks different.
You don’t need to be with someone to be whole.
Your empathy is powerful, build it up.
You have a soft and gentle spirit, protect yourself, learn how to say no.
Your mind will tell you a lot of lies, declare your power and control over yourself.
People have their own trauma and will show it through their behavior, do not take it personal.
Self-awareness is scary but necessary.
Your mind is very very powerful, use it to create and influence change.
Your purpose is beyond what you can fathom, manifest it with all of your being.
Depression and anxiety will not defeat you.
It’s taken some time to learn these lessons, and probably would have been helpful growing up, but you know now and that’s what’s important. You know that your life is valuable although you may feel tortured sometimes. Keep that smile on your face because its beyond beautiful.
Despite the pain, the tears, and the loneliness, you have a job to do. Get up and keep going.
“Have you ever wanted to be taller? Or maybe felt less than because your grades weren’t the best in the class? Ever felt yourself changing in ways that weren’t really like you to fit into a crowd? Comparing ourselves to others and stunting our sense of self-worth to be more like the people around us harms our views of who we are. The more we compare and strive to be what we are not, the more we lose what we are and who we want to become.
How do we shift comparing ourselves to others to accepting and growing in self-love?”
“A gratitude list is a list of things, places, people, situations, or traits about ourselves that we are grateful for. Creating a gratitude list helps us to reflect and think through what’s good about our experiences and life overall. Building a habit of gratitude increases our awareness, knowledge, and point of contact when we find ourselves comparing our lives with others.”
“Personal boundaries are what separate us from giving too much of ourselves to things, people, and situations that do not serve our growth and progress. While it may appear ideal to be able to do everything and anything without limits, we cannot and should not exhaust ourselves of our personal needs. We are responsible for what we allow. Whether in relationships (familial or romantic), with friends, at work, or anywhere where we are interacting with others, practicing boundaries helps us to be in tune with ourselves and our values.”
“Writing and creative expression not only helps me build a new perspective on growth, vulnerability, and self-awareness but also helps me manage my depressive and anxious symptoms as well. The more I write and ask myself important questions, the more I’m able to identify my triggers and heal through them.”
“Experiencing a panic attack is exhausting, draining and can take days to recover from. While we sometimes do our best to prevent an escalation into a panic attack, they still can happen. How do we feel like ourselves again following a panic attack? What are some positive coping techniques we can use to improve our self-care?”
For 2020 and beyond I am prioritizing self-care and self-love that is defined by me and only me. With each week reflecting on various ways to reflect and process my feelings, this week is redefining my worth to MYSELF.
Having a past of people-pleasing is hard to realize and even harder to overcome. Not seeing myself as valuable or worthy of love has influenced a history of constant “doing” in order to prove myself to those around me.
This habit ends now.
So, I’m saying no to:
What is not for me.
What makes me uncomfortable.
What doesn’t serve my needs.
What I don’t have the energy for.
Being available to everyone.
Giving away all of my energy.
“Fixing” other people’s problems.
And, I’m saying yes to:
What fills me with joy.
Building lasting connections.
Feeling good about myself.
Expressing my needs.
Allowing myself to be seen.
Reaching out to others.
Doing things for fun.
Being open to love.
Affirmation: I am open to loving myself unconditionally and unapologetically.