Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Mental Health, Potential and Worth, Power, Quotes, Self-Care, Self-Talk

Are You Holding On To Something? Read This

Often times we stay stuck in the reality of our past. We dwell and ruminate on the what-ifs and maybes. We stand in what we can’t walk away from. But, that doesn’t have to be where we are forever. We can give ourselves permission to move forward. We can dissect and navigate our mistakes, regrets, and pain in order to clear the path of progress for ourselves. The more we become comfortable with our discomfort and adjust our eyes in the darkest parts of ourselves, we learn to forgive what we were and make room for who we can become.

Make room for yourself to walk forward. Clear a path so that you can forgive and lift the weight that’s been keeping you standing instead of moving forward. Manifest something different. Manifest clarity and grace. Manifest wellness and peace. You deserve to feel free. This is your time for freedom.

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Mental Health, Potential and Worth, Power, Quotes, Self-Care, Self-Talk

A Series of Quotes: Recycling Pain Through Our Behavior

Growth and Transformation Through Awareness: Pain and Toxic Traits

We all have a way in which we think and act based on our beliefs and ideas. Sometimes, however, our judgment and growth are clouded by the pain and trauma we often recycle through our toxic habits and behaviors.

The tricky thing about pain is how deeply rooted it is. We don’t see our behavior as toxic or hurtful until it’s too late and we’ve already hurt someone we might care for.

In order to identify those toxic cycles, we must grow in self-awareness. The more self-aware we become, the more we are able to catch ourselves and understand why we act the way we do. Although some behaviors may appear harmless, like numbing our feelings and trying not to cope with our pain, if repressed for too long, will eventually appear in our behavior.

Projection occurs when we place how we treat ourselves onto the people we love or want to love. Often unconsciously our own self-abandonment is how we begin to treat those around us.

The first step in feeling our pain is to accept that we’ve hurt someone and forgive ourselves. If we hold onto the pain and regret, it will stay with us and lead how we treat those who enter our lives.

Once aware, begin the process of identifying in what ways we can improve and begin to love ourselves in that process. Although we can’t undo another person’s pain, we can improve and heal through our own. We must learn who we are and the pain that guided our past self.

The growth that self-awareness brings can resurface memories and thoughts that created the original pain, but that process will birth a transformed perspective.

We learn through experiences and wanting to do better. Without the urge to do better, the pain will validate itself and remain how we see ourselves.

Important note: This process can be difficult to do on our own but I found therapy, self-help books, meditation, writing, reflective exercises, support groups, and mental health resources to be a great help in beginning this process.

Posted in Confessions, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Mental Health, Potential and Worth, Power, Reflection, Self-Care, Self-Talk

#IAM

If I were to tell you that the lists of things you’ve done, the relationships you have, or the job titles you’ve held don’t make you who you are, would you believe me?
If I were to tell you that you are whole just because, would you think I’m wrong?No matter what we do or who we think we have to become we are fundamentally valuable and worth living every single day. It doesn’t matter how much we get done, or how much we’ve been through, every day we wake up we hold the power of our value and worth and that never changes.”I am” despite of anything that follows that statement.

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Mental Health, Potential and Worth, Power, Quotes, Self-Care, Self-Talk

A Powerful Affirmation: Choosing Calmness

The choice to be calm is a talent. Even with all that goes on in my head, and the worry that sometimes consumes my thoughts, I CHOOSE to be gentle, mindful, and calm.

With each day, I allow myself to reflect, take what I need, let go of what I don’t, and move on with grace.

I will not panic.

I will not worry.

I will not stress.

I will map out my next steps and take one moment at a time.


Find it on The Mighty here.

Posted in Confessions, Defying Shadows Articles, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Mental Health, Other Publications, Potential and Worth, Power, Reflection, Self-Care, Self-Talk, What Just Happened: Personal Anecdotes

Defying Shadows Article: Why I Choose to Talk About my Mental Health

You see me express myself, I wear my emotional wounds for all to see. I’m building my self-awareness through my healing and it’s because I choose to write about my mental health.

“I write and talk about my mental health because I know what it’s like to feel alone, unwanted, worthless, hopeless, and unaccomplished. I know what it’s like to feel invisible, to worry to the point of a panic attack, and to feel trapped. I write and talk about my mental health because deep down I wish I can hug and show all those who suffer silently that they don’t have to suffer alone. I write to share and motivate others to keep going even if they feel they can’t.

I neglected my mental health and thought I wasn’t good enough or worthy of love and life unless I proved myself to be so. I didn’t understand my intrinsic worth or purpose and because of this lived in a constant state of depression and anxiety.

If you are reading this, know that you are more than. You are full of purpose, power, and worth and nothing and no one can strip you of this. No matter what those negative thoughts said, you are doing a great job and I’m proud of you.”

Link: Why I Choose to Talk About my Mental Health

Posted in Confessions, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Potential and Worth, Power, Reflection, Self-Care, Self-Talk, What Just Happened: Personal Anecdotes

The Five Promises of Reclaiming Myself

Dear Nina,

I’m so proud of all you’ve accomplished this year; from facing your fears and sharing your story to starting therapy and unpacking all that’s going on in your head. The more time goes on, the more you’re growing into the woman that shatters stereotypes and demolishes stigma and that makes you amazing.

From now on here are five promises to make to yourself:
1. Honor yourself and your mental health by setting clear boundaries and never settling for less.
2. Put yourself first because you matter, too.
3. Have some fun, however that looks for you, and be easy on yourself.
4. Take breaks because you deserve to feel energized and ready to take on those big projects you love.
5. Reminding yourself daily that you are enough and DO NOT NEED anyone to validate that FACT.

There’s so much in store for you so stop questioning your worth and value because of how others treat you. Learn to love yourself REGARDLESS. You are a shining light and I hope you learn to believe that.This is the year of reclaiming self.

With all the love in the world
From the best parts of you,
SparklyWarTanks

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Potential and Worth, Power, Quotes, Self-Care, Self-Talk

Ever Been Ignored or Rejected?

Yes, I’ve been rejected.

Yes, I’ve been ghosted.

Yes, I’ve been ignored.

Yes, I’ve been pushed to the side.

Also, yes, I thought because this happened so often I was somehow unlovable, ugly, unworthy of attention or love. I thought I deserved this because something was “wrong” with me and I needed to “fix” myself so others would want me.

25 years and counting and now I know that I am not a reflection of how I was treated, of the countless times I didn’t feel good enough. I know now I am worthy of love, affection, and attention. This does not mean, however, that no one will reject, ghost, or push me to the side; but this does mean that I have the choice to not allow someone else’s behavior to reflect how I see my worth.

My worth and value are intrinsic. No one can take away my worth.

So, if you ever find yourself questioning your worth because of how someone else treated you, STOP. Always remember that you are worthy, enough, valuable, lovable, and beautiful. No one can take those ineffaceable things from you.

The more you learn to love yourself, the easier it will become to not allow other people’s actions to sway how you see everything you already are.

Posted in Challenges, Confessions, Creations, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Potential and Worth, Power, Reflection, Self-Care, Self-Talk

I Am More Than

Pushing to a workable perspective means knowing who we are apart from the struggles we face; knowing we are much more than the hardship we experience.

As we progress, we must first declare what we are more than. Whether it’s that one negative thought, that mental health condition, the low self-esteem, or the chronic pain, WE ARE MORE.

We are multifaceted, talented, spectacular warriors that regardless of what we experience, we are still more than and we keep going.


This is what I am more than:

  • I am more than those negative thoughts.
  • I am more than depression.
  • I am more than anxiety.
  • I am more than low self-esteem.
  • I am more than self-doubt.
  • I am more than worrying.
  • I am more than isolation.

Tell me what you are more than.

See it on The Mighty here.

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Mental Health, Potential and Worth, Power, Quotes, Self-Care, Self-Talk

Affirmation of Love

I accept that even though life may bring rejection, love will remain present and flowing into my life.

Despite the pain that may arise from wounds of abandonment, love remains present in my life.

As I grow into an adult and I grow in self-awareness, love will become more apparent.

The more I grow into who I am, self-love will also bloom as I do.

No matter the circumstance, I will always remember to affirm and acknowledge that love will always be present; both inside and outside of myself.

Posted in Love, Making Sense Analysis, Notes, Self-Care, Self-Talk

Note 36 For the Highly Sensitive: Molding Love in the Wrong People

Sparkly is a space where I not only write to inspire and motivate, but it’s also a space where I make tangible the obstacles I face in hopes of finding balance and understanding. With that being said, I’ve been experiencing an inner battle with myself (and often see it in others who I care about).

Love in the Wrong People…

Finding love and acceptance is difficult in the 20 something ages. We often feel like we have to find love and begin the process of building bonds with anyone who comes our way and sparks even the simplest of interests. The issues in this process, however, especially those who are caring, sensitive, and good hearted is we let our guard down in hopes of making that interest work even if that person is not good for us.

As we fear being alone, rejected, neglected, abandoned, or even starting over, and in pursuits to “fix” the broken pieces of potential love, we often forget self-care, boundaries, and our worth. We convince ourselves that our “love” for that potential is what will somehow change and evolve the toxicity of the relationship that’s been built. We create this love with the small growth we see in something that we want so bad to work.

We care too much about the other and not enough about ourselves.

The Reality of it is

With even the most common of sense, or the conversations that we think will help the other understand us, not everyone has good intentions, not everyone is good for us, and not everyone can/wants to change. Some people see no issues in what they do.

Whether it’s built up trauma from childhood, their own defense mechanisms, or “just how they are,” we are not responsible for igniting growth or enduring pain and abuse from anyone. Just because we can see how much someone can grow does not mean we have to be the stepping stones to that growth, if that growth is even authentic.

Letting Go and Moving On…

While we ourselves are responsible for our own happiness, growth, and self-development, so are the ones that we take up that responsibility for. If they see that they are hurting someone and continue to hurt them, let them go. You are way too valuable. They need to grow on their own, without latching on to anyone to guide the way for them. Making them feel good or allowing their toxic behavior to persist without consequences will enable them to continue in their destructive nature.

In the slightest moment where you feel uncomfortable, or confused listen to your body signals to understanding what to do. Stop ignoring the signs of doing better for yourself.

I know we have so much love to give, and we want to be accepted in order to nurture another (as it may nutures us and our trauma/people pleasing tendencies) we have to find peace and acceptance within ourselves. We can attract those who are hurt and in your conflicting intentions and personalities create something unhealthy.