Tag: Self-Talk

Posted in Confessions, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Notes, Self-Talk

SWT 100 Notes Note 27: Love in a Danger Zone

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

Sometimes I wonder if something is wrong with me. How is it that I can love deeply like this? I think of the ways that can make someone else smile. I spend hours looking for something or thinking up ideas on ways I can express my love. Why? Is it that serious? But then I feel bad because sometimes I don’t get the magnitude of love back that I’m giving so I break down. I feel betrayed. Why do I love like this? Even when I can’t afford to love like I do, I’ll go broke drowning in my giving.

I wish I can give the world when I can’t. I’m working too hard to get the love I’m letting out. I don’t want to look crazy for being creative with my love so I feel like I’m retreating to a dark place in my self-esteem. I’m afraid of being hurt and embarrassed for doing too much.

I just want love too.

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Late Night Talks With Nina, Potential and Worth, Self-Care, Self-Talk, Videos

Late Night Talks with Nina: 14 Sparkly Reminders for Self-care

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

List of 14 reminders referred and read in video for self-care while you get through your days.

  • Love yourself
  • Practice Self-care
  • Be patient with yourself
  • Give yourself gealthy work loads
  • Don’t overthink
  • Say “no” when necessary
  • Give yoyrself credit
  • Sleep at night
  • Eat breakfast..lunch…and dinner
  • Talk posutive to yourself
  • Ask for HELP!!
  • Continuously realize who you are.
  • You are an individual
  • You are talented
  • No one is like you.
  • Make list as to not overload your mind with things to do.
  • Remind yourself that you are worthy, beautiful, and a life worth living.

Take care and be safe.

    Posted in Confessions, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Self-Care, Self-Talk

    BayArt Article: Tough Love Doesn’t Work for a Perfectionist

    Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

    Perfectionism: Being Tough on Myself

    Since I was a little girl I’ve been a perfectionist. The way I colored in the lines or how my homework had to be neat all the time, showed how hard I was on myself to be my best and do my best. I was tough on myself at a young age. My grades had to be perfect. I was my worst critic and worse enemy. These moments created the negative self-talk habits that eventually evolved into anxiety (but that’s my other story).

    Everyone who knew me was always so surprised at how hard I worked or how much effort I put into things even if that much work wasn’t necessary. I always pushed myself to the limit and challenged myself to be the best I can. This mindset wasn’t always healthy or helpful for me. That five page paper that was supposed to be two pages or those four page notes that was supposed to be one or two was how much more time I put into things I didn’t need to, but let me get to the point. How hard I worked and how much energy I put into the most basic things created in me a monster of perfectionist tendencies that didn’t allow for me to be compassionate to myself.

    Tough Love and Anger

    As I got older I began meeting people (i.e teachers and religious leaders) who believed in using tough love to get across to others. Their lack of soft compassion made me even more hard on myself and more angry that I should be better and doing better. This made me hate them for not seeing how much work I put into things that I did. Phrases like “what happened?”,”You should have done better”, “this is not like you”, you’ll be okay”,”toughen up and do better” and “get better because people are watching you” became extremely toxic to the already monster of perfectionism that drove me crazy daily. I became angry and frustrated. People who used tough love around me made me avoid them, prohibiting me in learning self- love and compassion. I was always on myself and didn’t know how to slow down and rest. When I was struggling, I didn’t know how to tell others. I would convince myself that I’m always supposed to be okay and ready all the time.

    While I did have supportive people in my life, those who used tough love weren’t as effective even if they had good intentions. I appreciate how much I learned about myself, however, though the bumpy roads of my childhood and teen years though those people who showed me tough love.

    Moral of the Story: Takeaways

    Be kind to yourself and others and also show your children that it’s OK to fail. Learning and growing with your failures is important in self-development. I wasn’t accepting of failure and that made me into the perfectionist monster I was. Because I wasn’t compassionate to myself, the lack of compassion from others made me angry and frustrated. I didn’t learn how to slow down till later in life. I didn’t learn the word no till I was 22.
    Self-care and compassion is important. Be compassionate to yourself. Learn self-worth and slow down when you feel yourself working too much. Being the best isn’t necessary as long as you put in how much effort you can. Put in a healthy amount of effort into task. Your worth and your energy is based on you. Know your worth and put a healthy amount of energy into your daily activities. Be kind to yourself and learn to say to yourself “I did a good job. Now I can rest.”

    Also, not everyone reacts positively to tough love so remember to always add compassion and love in your interactions. Some people have daily battles mentally and may take offense to phrases that aren’t helpful in showing them how, what, or when to do better. Be encouraging.

    Find article in link below:

    Realization: Tough Love Doesn’t Work for a Perfectionist

    Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Notes, Self-Care, Self-Talk

    SWT 100 Notes: Note 24

    Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

    Being supportive and positive to yourself will go along way in your road to healing and recovering. There are moments whether mentally, physically, or emotionally ill where you just need kind words that will help you through the moment.

    A troubled mind or moment won’t last forever and until you can tell that to yourself, struggling will feel like an eternity. Be good to yourself. Think and be encouraging. Speak recovery into the moment of the struggle and the struggle will pass you.

    Be brave. That single moment of brave positivity will build your stamina and will catalyst healing.

    Posted in Bulletins, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Potential and Worth, Power, Self-Care, Self-Talk

    Mass Bulletin Board: 2017 in Review

    Posted on by SparklyWarTanks






















































    January: Control
    February: Perseverance and Confidence
    March: Purpose
    April: Self-Acceptance
    May: Self-Care and Self-Appreciation
    June: Talent and Creativity
    July: Love
    August: Moving Forward, Progression and Transformation
    September: Empathy
    October: Compassion and Kindness
    November: Strength and Power
    December: Endings, Beginnings, and Continuations

    Building perspective is what builds character and what allows you to move to the realm of transformation. To understand others is to understand yourself in a community and as an individual. To understand control, perseverance, confidence, purpose, self-acceptance, self-care, self-appreciation, talent, creativity, love, moving forward, progression, empathy, compassion, kindness, strength, power, and what it means to continue, end and begin in order to transform into yourself. While you look into yourself, how you experience life, and what it means to build your identity in your individuality is to explore yourself in concepts and ideas. Who am I? What do I like? How do I love? How do I become better? How do I work on my mental health? How do I grow?

    Explore.

    Interact.

    React.

    Grow.

    Build.

    Break.

    Reveal.

    Communicate.

    Love.

    Empathize.

    Care.

    Understand.

    Learn.

    Work.

    Live.

    Continue in your life, in your journey, and in your purpose. Being alive is a purpose in itself. Be yourself. Build yourself. Love yourself.

    Posted in Bulletins, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Potential and Worth, Self-Care, Self-Talk

    Bulletin Board April 2017: Self-Acceptance

    Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

    Self-Acceptance   

    Self-acceptance is not only loving yourself physically, but appreciating and motivating yourself to enter spaces that make you feel comfortable and welcomed.

    Self-acceptance is knowing when to say no and when to walk away.

    Self-acceptance is to believe in things because they make you empowered and a better version of yourself.

    Self-acceptance is educating yourself and becoming well acquainted with things that you love.

     Self-acceptance is allowing yourself to live among people without comparing yourself to them.

    Self-acceptance is to self-realize and become comfortable with everything that makes you you.

    Self-acceptance is allowing yourself to feel peace and to take breaks.

    Self-acceptance is protecting yourself from situations, people, places, and things that harm your mental, physical, spiritual, or emotional well being.

    Self-acceptance is knowing that opportunities will open and believing greatness is waiting for you.

    Self-acceptance is being informed, aware, knowledgeable, wise, insightful, respectful, mindful, accepting, and humble.

    Self-acceptance is practicing self-patience and self-love.

    Self-acceptance is asking and receiving help if you need it.

    Self-acceptance is knowing who you are while still living in a sea of diversity and still being able to call yourself an individual who is capable of living and breathing without the approval of others.

    So..accept yourself.

     

    Posted in Creative Writing, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Potential and Worth, Power, Self-Care, Self-Talk

    A Spark of Encouragement

    Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

    It’s been a difficult few weeks and I find myself getting more and more discouraged so this letter is to me from me with love, affection, power, and strength.

    Dear Nina,

    Hey girl! I see you struggling and I know you’re starting to doubt yourself again.  I see you starting to not believe in how much you worked and how much you sacrificed to be in the place you’re in now.  I see that you’re starting to feel like you aren’t good enough and that you wasted your time in the classroom.  I see that you feel invisible and unattractive.  I see that you feel trapped, unskilled, and untalented. I see that you feel ashamed that you struggle mentally and you often wonder how it would feel to be “normal” and unafraid of  the strains of every day.   I see that it takes so much work just to be happy that a new day has come because you feel like you should be successful with opportunity, strength, and power.  

    But I also see that you gained more strength I’ve ever seen you have before.  That you try your hardest and prove to yourself every day that it’s possible to, despite the struggle, regain consciousness of the reality of hope and positivity.  And even though things have been difficult, you still seem to always persevere, you seem to always push through.  Every obstacle that has come in your way since you were young has never devoured you.  When you were grappling with your mental health in high school and college, you always made it past the panic and the tears.  You always showed up and showed out even when you didn’t want to. When you didn’t have motivation, when you didn’t want to go to the counseling center or psych services you did.  When they took away your financial aid and you almost didn’t go to college things turned around.  When you were called weak and told you were unable to reach the standards of your major in high school, you showed that you were, you were tossed from one choir to another, but you still showed that you were good enough.  When you were on conditional in a program you wanted to be in so bad, you made that conditional a permanent. And all the times you were outcasted and alone, when you were by yourself you always sparkled with power, self-control, and self-respect.  This is not even half of the things you struggle with, but its shows a lot about how much you’ve overcome. 

    You are beautiful, worthy, and strong.  Only strength can endure all that you have gone through and still have the courage to want to tell other people that they can do anything despite the world telling them that they can’t because of their gender, beliefs, sexuality, or any other identity marker that makes them who they are.  You are okay and you will continue to be okay.  Just take deep breaths and raise your head.  Your life is not for no reason.  You have a reason to keep trying to do your best.     

    From the one that loves you the most, 

    Yourself 

    So, even though it may seem blurry right now and you don’t want to be positive, try to be kind to yourself.  Always be kind to yourself.  Turn the negative self-talk phrases into encouraging ones.  Make your perception light, even if your circumstance is dark and smudged.  Even when you have all the reasons to be hopeless, let hope blossom instead.

    Posted in Confessions, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration

    Not a Failure, You are not a Failure 

    Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

    Its been a long night, a night filled with silent and quiet panic attacks, ones that have been revealing and direct.  And as I lay in my bed, glancing at Jane the Virgin, but mostly visualizing my future in my head, I finally targeted the core trigger of the anxiety that’s been crippling my sleep. The trigger is fear of failure. Deep, paralyzing, you are nobody, and no one will ever notice you failure.  Seeing so many glory stories and positive things happening to people around me…nothing is happening for me. This has been what makes me nervous, nauseous and scared. 

    But maybe it really is all in my head and I just keep falling back on my perfectionist mindset that I should be someone by now that is feeding this trigger?

    I’m not a failure…I’m not a failure…