Author: SparklyWarTanks

Posted in Self-Care, What Just Happened: Personal Anecdotes

I Amplified my Anxiety Because…

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks
Shadowed Pencil drawing. Man with a cup in his hand and hand on his face.
Shadowed image. Used from http://perfect-madness.deviantart.com/art/shadow-of-sadness-33397143. Google Images.

Before

My senior year has been very rough this past couple of months. I slept the whole night half the week, the other half I stood up doing work and took short naps throughout the night. I never ate breakfast because class was more important. I never had time to start assignments early because I always had assignments due that day. In one week in September I had a panic attack every day of the week. I didn’t sleep well, I barely ate and if I did I ate one meal. I wasn’t taking care of myself. I panicked because I was stressed. I was anxious. I was scared. Each panic was due to a stressor that was out of my control or in my control that I lacked motivation to do. Things from home, assignments, tests, talking to other people, feeling weak, hopeless, and worthless were all the things I thought about and caused anxiety in me.

Why am I here?…What is my purpose?….What am I going to do after college?…Can I even get into grad school?

I was trapped in my own insecurities. Trapped in my own self-pity. Trapped in self-doubt. Trapped in fear. Trapped.

……..

Why was I anxious?

I was anxious because I wasn’t taking care of myself and I lacked energy, I lacked energy because I wasn’t eating right. I wasn’t sleeping sufficiently. I lacked motivation because I felt like I couldn’t do it. I was just tired. I didn’t want to continue.

After

But here is how I improved!

I can do it. I got this far to finish. I am worth it.

It wasn’t easy for me to realize I wasn’t a superhero, but I ultimately went for help. I went to talk to someone. I sat in the small room. I blurted out why to a stranger sitting in front of me because it was their job. It helped. I was able to talk about why. Why all of a sudden I couldn’t anymore.

Things are not fixed or perfect now, but I can say that I appreciate that I can identify what I need help in. I can’t achieve my goals in one night. Time is a thing. I have to be patient and I have to take care of myself in the mean time. If I don’t take care of myself I can’t achieve my goals to begin with.

I still barely sleep and I eat for the most part, but I changed how I thought about my circumstance.

I am good enough to do what I put my mind to.

Note: Make sure to take care of yourself because you are important, and you are worth it, and you can do it. Anything you put your mind to is yours already. Take time into consideration. Its okay to take breaks if you have to just get back and keep going.

I was tired, I wasn’t taking care of myself, I amplified my anxiety but now I know that I’m important too. My goals need me in the equation.

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Love, Self-Care

Take care of Yourself, You are your Most Prized Possession

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

Loving yourself and appreciating who you are also comes with taking care of yourself.  Often times we may forget, in the mist of all of our obligations and responsibilities, that we need to take care of ourselves too.  We can’t function and be who we are if we are not healthy and well mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  It may seem unimportant to simply have time to ourselves, sleep in once in a while, go out and have fun, but it’s as important as taking showers and brushing our teeth!  All of these things are necessary in order to maintain sanity and appreciate the sun coming up in the morning and going down at night.  Sometimes we need to take two seconds and reflect on everything that is going on around us.  Stepping back and reflecting allows us to process and take in situations and experiences.  If we are always on the go, if we are always running, we become overwhelmed and tired, we may even see ourselves loosing motivation and happiness.  We don’t want to lose reasons to wake up and see worth in every day!

Let’s take care of ourselves!

You can't pour from an empty cup, Take care of yourself first in black with an empty coffee mug in a wite plate with a spoon on it..
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Tumblr image

 

Posted in Potential and Worth, Power, What Just Happened: Personal Anecdotes

Why is Why Important [11/23/15]

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks
The word why in capital letters with a question mark in black with a white and faded blue background
The word why as a question. Original Photo.

About 5 days ago I laid in my bed after a long and tiring day.  As I laid in bed I struggled to see the reasons why I’m in school.  You know, like those moments where you ask yourself why.  The why for me in that moment came down like a ton of bricks.  I felt like I wasn’t good enough to be where I am in life, in school.  I started doubting myself and asking questions about whether I’m doing as good as I thought in my classes.  I just felt horrible and I didn’t know why the doubt and confusion struck me so hard.  It was hard to tell myself, Nina its okay!  You’re doing your best and that’s all you can give.

Now that I reflect on that moment, on a time that I felt worthless, powerless, and doubted my potential, I see that where I am in life itself represents what I can do and where I can go if I work on myself along with taking opportunities that can help me reach where I want to go in my future.

Although the why’s that pop up randomly sometimes make us think critically about our current position, where we are, and if we are actually making progress toward our true potential, they help us to see that we are going somewhere!  Going somewhere, whether it’s small, whether it’s moving toward saying I’m okay today, I appreciate myself today, I’m beautiful today, I made it through work today, I can today is meaningful progress.  Those why’s can be so blurry, but when they become clearer so does realizing your path and potential.

Stay positive and keep going!

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Potential and Worth, Power, Videos

Ted Talk: Roxane Gay on Feminism

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

I’m not saying that you have to be a feminist to show your true potential, nor do you have to agree with everything Roxane Gay has to say, but she does a brilliant job at showing her views!  She’s says she’s a “bad feminist,” but she is beautiful and amazing at realizing and showing her potential through her views on women and ways in which she sees the world through her eyes.

Potential revealed through words and perspective.

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Potential and Worth, Power

Potential, Power, and Worth

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

It’s not always easy realizing the power and worth you have. Potential is revealed through hard work and dedication, but if you are not willing or motivated to push past boundaries to see your fullest potential then it’s difficult to see yourself as anything but average. I’m here to say that your power and worth is greater than what you see yourself to be. Your worth is built up on the ability, your ability, to strive and reach for your maximum potential. The more you see yourself worthy, the more your power and potential is manifested in the way you walk, talk, and carry out even the smallest everyday tasks.

Strive to find that power. Strive to see that worth. Strive to reach your fullest potential! Potential does not have to mean strain and it doesn’t have to mean running a marathon, or becoming tired, potential is everything that makes you YOU! Potential is your capacity to show the worth who you are, to show yourself that you can be who you want to be despite societal expectation. Potential can mean the way you discuss your passions to a stranger, potential can mean the way you communicate with your family and friends, potential can mean the way you love yourself enough to keep going to work or school even though you are struggling. Potential gives birth to self-worth and power in oneself. Giving yourself freedom to live and be yourself is manifested potential. Not everyone is able to realize their worth and power because they have given up their fight on potential.

Being yourself, loving yourself, valuing yourself, and finding worth in who you are and what you can bring forth in encountering tasks and people you meet shows your potential and your power.

Show everyone what you are made of!

Quote
Louise L. Hay Quote on Power. Used from http://halboor.com/healyourbody. Google images.
Posted in Challenges, Self-Talk

The 9 Step “I got this” Challenge

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks
Quote Repeat
“I can do this.” Taken from positivelifetips.com. Google images.

Step 1: Wake up a couple minutes earlier then usual

Step 2: Do Not think of anything negative that pertains to the day that is to follow

Step 3: Stretch and take several deep breaths

Step 4: Get out of bed

Step 5: Do what you normally do in the morning (i.e brush your teeth, take a shower, get ready for work/school/the day)

Step 6: Say three times “I Got This!” (actually mean it)

Step 7: Eat breakfast!

Step 8: Think of the first two task you have to complete

Step 9: Leave your home or start your work or morning tasks wherever  or whatever that may be

Although this challenge may seem simplistic and purposeless, the goal of the challenge is to set a positive tone for the day.  While you are breathing, stretching and waking up in the morning, you are setting the scene for how the day will play out.  If you declare that you will have a positive day, then the day will turn out great.  Just by doing your regular morning routines with a positive mindset you are able to  push through any obstacles that may be waiting for you throughout the day.  By saying “you got this,” everything will be seen in a brighter light.  Doing these simple tasks  are just a step toward a more productive you.  Do this every day and you will begin to see that you want to wake up in the morning.

Even though you may be tired and you don’t want to continue on, just telling yourself that you can get up and get the day started helps! Start off your day thinking about only the immediate things, like the things you have to do in the next few hours, don’t think about the whole day.  Chop up your day and think about only the moment you are in.

You can do it! You got this!!

 

 

 

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, What Just Happened: Personal Anecdotes

You Got This!

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

In reflecting about the topic and main focus of this weeks posts, I decided to say these three words

to who ever may come across this post: YOU GOT THIS!  No matter what you may think or feel in your current situation, no matter how cumbersome of tiresome your day to day or weekly tasks may be, you are able to get everything done and done well.

For the past few months I’ve been bombarded with classwork and homework along with working on my research and grad school applications.  I’ve had several  break downs and have felt stressed to the point where I just sit in my bed with no energy just worried about everything.  This technique, in case you haven’t already noticed, is extremely ineffective!  Instead of just laying in bed and basking in the ambiance of my misery, all I needed to do was get up dust off my doubts, lack of motivation, and self pity and say I got this.  Of course, its not always easy just to get up and continue to keep going and push through your everyday struggles, but you can do it!  You’ve been doing it!

I believe that you can break through and shatter all that is holding you back from your greatest potentials.  In order to do this, however, you must first believe that you are able and you are so just get up from your bed of tired, helpless, and hopeless thoughts.  You got it!

Quote
Keep Calm Image. Used from http://www.keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk/p/keep-calm-you-got-this-76/. Google Image.
Posted in Challenges, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration

Mirror Challenge!

Posted on by SparklyWarTanks

screenshot_2016-11-16-04-34-51-1.png

I challenge you this week to look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are worthy and beautiful everyday for the rest of the year.  Take a deep breath and proclaim that you are what you see in the mirror.   Putting your feelings to the side as well as your self-doubt, low self-esteem and anything that will hider you from seeing yourself for the beauty that is in front of you say and believe that beauty is standing in front of you.