Posted in Confessions, Creative Writing, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration

Get Out Of Your Head

They say you’re always in your head

Thinking up something
Breaking something apart
They say you’re always in your head
Creating a world of your own
A la la land of sorts
Creating solutions to problems over and over
It becomes a problem
Making you something that is a bit extra
I say you’re extra-ordinary
The creative space that’s filled with something that’s a bit extra
You talk too much
You dream too much
You are a problem
The way you can craft out the ideas that make you curious
Every thought you have you say out loud
You’re annoying
You’re sensitive
They say you’re always in your head
You feel
You know
You see
You examine
You speak
They say it makes you annoying
Get out of your head
It’s nothing
You want something to be more than it is
You want to experience the world that’s in your head
You keep going
Keep talking
Keep trying
They tell you to stop
You’re dragging the issue
You know it’s because of the extra you have in you
Creating solutions to problems over and over
You care too much
You love too much
You’re sorry a lot
You wish you were perfect
It’s because you’re always in your head
You see how invested you get
You want so much more than what is being offered
You want them to share their world with you
And when they don’t, your world gets filled with gaps and spaces
You want something extra because you are extra
It’s because…you’re always in your head
Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Potential and Worth, Power, Quotes, Self-Care, Self-Talk

What You Manifest is What You Recieve

What you see for yourself, what you say to yourself, and what you speak out loud is what will come to existence. While noticing and accepting the power of manifestation, you are able to see the life, body, and mental stability you are exuding. The more negativity and doubt you spew into manifestation the likelihood of it happening will increase. Practice patience and understanding in order to receive and reap the benefits of your desires and wants.

Success is a state of mind in manifestation. You are already successful. Desiring more than your current state is only a matter of persistence and work. What you say you can do, you are already doing. You are working toward a goal, an anticipated manifestation.

Become more of what you want without the doubts that come with obstacles. The path that is created based on the work you are putting in, is what is being manifested to you. Sometimes it may not look exactly how you planned, but it is exactly what you need.

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Mental Health, Potential and Worth, Self-Care, Self-Talk, Voices Of Mental Health

Voices of Mental Health: Subduing the Mental Bully

Ever sit back and think about how you are speaking to yourself? Guilty of having a toxic self-talk allowed me to realize the power and strength of building a workable and positive alternative approach to how I talk to myself.

Read about switching up your self-talk from toxic to workable in my article:

Subduing the Mental Bully: Creating a Positive and Workable Self-Talk.

Posted in Creative Writing

Behind the Dark Side of a Selfie

The thing about selfies is you can get the right angel. Put the right face. Send the story you want to tell.
The thing about selfies is you can hide your pain and insecurities. You can filter out what you don’t want to see. You can convince yourself that what you hate about yourself can be taken out.
The thing about selfies is you create what you want to see. You craft the image you want others to see. You unsee the flaws and the suffering.
The thing about selfies is the life is taken out of the snapshot. Just one moment. One instance of stillness.
Selfies are our way of capturing the best light of ourselves. The selves we get excited for we capture in an instant.
When we turn the wrong direction we hate it. We delete it. We don’t want to see it. We speak I’ll of our image.
And that is who we are.
We can’t look at ourselves for long moments in the mirror, in our lives in motion, instead we would rather take a selfie.
A selfie stops time to capture the one moment we see ourselves as beautiful because otherwise that’s not who we see at all.

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Late Night Talks With Nina, Mental Health, Self-Care, Self-Talk, Videos

Late Night talks with Nina: Let’s talk about Depression and Mental Illness

Let’s not only look out for our “strong friends” in the wake of the multiple suicides that has surfaced in the past month. Let’s talk about depression wholeatically and ways that we can be helpful to one another. Let’s talk about mental illnesses and things that we can do to better the lives of the ones we see show symptoms that are obvious and not so obvious. Let’s be aware and awake for one another. Let’s be supportive, invested, and not afraid to sit and talk to each other about mental struggles we go through. Let’s look out for everyone and not just the ones we suspect are “too strong” and may be hiding depression. Let’s instead understand, learn, and gain perspective about mental illnesses and ways that we, as their loved ones, can continuously aid in their healing process. Let the ones who are struggling be comfortable enough to talk about their struggles even if it’s vague or confusing at first. Let us be authentic to one another. Let us ask questions, be present, and actively love on each other.

Posted in Confessions, Creative Writing, Mental Health, Notes

SWT 100 Notes: Note 19

This is a letter from the one that kills herself trying to be the best because shes always been in the shadows.

The loser.

The second best.

The girl whos been rejected.

The girl who developed anxiety because she overcompensates and overdoes it.

The one who was so tedious in her actions that she gets nervous when shes not perfect.

The one who got up extra early to be on time but all she gained from that was loss of sleep.

The one who stood up all night studying and skipped breakfast.

The one who raised her hand every class.

The one who was the weakest link.

The one who couldn’t go to graduate school.

The one whos mental illnesses crippled her to mental paralysis. Dark. In a daze. She just wanted to be...the best.

The best is an illusion. The best is fake. The best is a lie. No one is the best. Everyone has talents. Everyone is really good at some things, and not so good in others. You have something about you thats great. That doesn’t make you better, or the best, it makes you who you are.

Get rid of the notion that you need to be the best. The best is a disease. Take your time. Go slow. Find yourself. You’ll then realize the best is already in you.

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Reflection, What Just Happened: Personal Anecdotes

One Reflection 

We are getting closer to the end of this year and I can’t help but be thankful. In the moments of darkness and in those of light, I’ve still been able to breathe. While I had to maintain and sustain myself to keep going, while sometimes I felt weakest, I can stand to say I made it through every moment. My imagination and creativity went crazy and for that I’m most excited. This year has been a sparkly one and in a war zone at that. While I continue to build my tough skin and stamina, while I continue to transform into a heightened self, I want to thank those who loved me through every moment. So much new has come this year it was overwhelming, but so much old has stayed too. 

SparklyWarTanks will continue to get stronger and so will my love and gratitude, especially for those who  keep up with me. New thing will come in the years to come and I’m ready. 

I’m ready to continue to declare war for myself and for others. For my women, those that struggle to wake up and those that have no other choice to be strong. I also declare war for the sake of equality and justice to dismantle the patriarchy and white supremacy, racism, sexism, homophobia, islamaphobia, all those things that push us into fearing one another, its time to take those ideologies and break them. Through these systems we are seperate, but only in unity will we become our most enlightened selves. 

While we have so much to do, we still have the potential to be our greatest selves, as a community, as a society, as one.

Posted in Notes

SWT 100 Notes: Note 2

In yet a targeted yet random thought… Note 2: Search for the courage to leave abusive situations. Abuse is long lasting and causes physical and emotional trauma and damage. No one should ever be in a place dealing and compromising their happiness and sanity to stay in these relationships. There are people that love you. Enough is enough.

http://www.thehotline.org/is-this-abuse/

Posted in Confessions, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration

Not a Failure, You are not a Failure 

Its been a long night, a night filled with silent and quiet panic attacks, ones that have been revealing and direct.  And as I lay in my bed, glancing at Jane the Virgin, but mostly visualizing my future in my head, I finally targeted the core trigger of the anxiety that’s been crippling my sleep. The trigger is fear of failure. Deep, paralyzing, you are nobody, and no one will ever notice you failure.  Seeing so many glory stories and positive things happening to people around me…nothing is happening for me. This has been what makes me nervous, nauseous and scared. 

But maybe it really is all in my head and I just keep falling back on my perfectionist mindset that I should be someone by now that is feeding this trigger?

I’m not a failure…I’m not a failure…

Posted in Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Making Sense Analysis, My Trending Stories, Power, Quotes

Freedom Quote: Wage War on Invasive Thoughts

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5 Steps to winning the war against invasive thoughts.

Invade

Wage War

Win

Leave a Warning to Others

Walk Away

You have all the power and ability to change your mind and shift the negative energy and make it go away for good.  Don’t give the invasive thoughts the power to take over your mind and make you feel insane.  You are in charge of your sanity and negativity can not take your own autonomy and self-control.  Switch it up right when you feel it creeping up.  Don’t allow your mind to turn on itself.  You are in control.  You will always be in charge. Time to take back your mind. Declare the war. You will win.