Posted in Confessions, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration

Not a Failure, You are not a Failure 

Its been a long night, a night filled with silent and quiet panic attacks, ones that have been revealing and direct.  And as I lay in my bed, glancing at Jane the Virgin, but mostly visualizing my future in my head, I finally targeted the core trigger of the anxiety that’s been crippling my sleep. The trigger is fear of failure. Deep, paralyzing, you are nobody, and no one will ever notice you failure.  Seeing so many glory stories and positive things happening to people around me…nothing is happening for me. This has been what makes me nervous, nauseous and scared. 

But maybe it really is all in my head and I just keep falling back on my perfectionist mindset that I should be someone by now that is feeding this trigger?

I’m not a failure…I’m not a failure…

Posted in Creative Writing, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Potential and Worth, Power

Drown

Submerge and fall

Into the dark space where you are alone with yourself

Sink

Drown in the depth of yourself and stay there

Die to normality and resurrect into individuality

Let yourself be enveloped in the seas of your creative mind

Create what only your mind can sprout

Mold and plant

Let the seas around you overwhelm your creative

Make something

Fall deep in the darkest place in the bottom of the sea

Let yourself hit the sea floor

Let your body and mind save you

Swim up to the shore

Walk

From the bottom of the sea you are born once again

But something in you has died

The chains

The ones that held your creative captive

You left them at the bottom of the sea

Thats the part of you that stayed submerged

Now

You drowned, but you still breathe

You breathe by yourself


The image has been created

Fall

Submerge

Drown

Die to normality and resurrect into individuality

Posted in Creative Writing, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, My Trending Stories

Self-Realization

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I was scared of my deepened sadness and pessimism

I was scared when I started to panic

I was scared when my shadow was resurrecting itself from the depths of my regression

The ways I wanted to perfect myself in the mirror or I would hate how I looked

The ways I didn’t believe anymore

The way I felt what everyone else was feeling

The anger I felt when they said I couldn’t

The tendencies

The habits

I locked myself in my room

I closed my door

I stood by myself

Myself was coming out

I wanted to lock her back in my psyche

I realized that who she is who I am

I wanted to swallow her in myself

Again

It’s better not to cope in that way…

Cope with regression

Instead of coping with progression

I learned that she is me

The me who was a step ahead of who I was

I read the note she wrote me when she came out

I am dangerous

I am who you are

The girl who is unafraid

Unafraid of the unknown ahead

Because you don’t know who I am

But I know who you are

And it’s time for that girl to wake up a woman

A woman who is unapologetically in control of herself

And nothing will make her afraid of every part of herself that she once hid away from reality

She is you and you can’t hide her anymore

I am here and I am you

Digest the words…

Control

Power

Peace

Perseverance

and beginning

This is a beginning

Posted in Creative Writing, Keep Moving: Motivation and Inspiration, Power, Self-Talk, Weekly Bulletin

Bulletin Board February 2017: Perseverance and Confidence

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February has been a month of inner confidence and perseverance despite self-discouragement, but also a month of continued change and progress.  Perseverance is the one thing that will show your strength in troubled situations and continuous turmoil.  The more you push through and work even when you’re tired and dreary, the more you convince yourself that what you’re doing is worth it, then you will always persevere through it.  Your power is limitless once you continue overcoming everything that’s placed in your way. Normality might get in your way, negativity might get in your way, self-doubt, self-hate, lack of finances, lack of motivation all might get in your way, but overcoming those obstacles will build someone not phased by downfalls, but someone who stands and faces any challenge.